…still haven’t found what I’m looking for…

I have been working on this one short story for months. I pick it up. I put it down. I write. I erase. I cut. I replace. I know there’s a story there but I am too paralyzed to figure out what exactly it is.

The people in my brain are at war. The ones who want to just write the story and let it be what it will don’t impress the ones who want the story to be literary and worthy of publication in a good journal. They constantly bicker about appropriate plot devices, characterization, dialogue…so much so that I can’t get an idea in edgewise.

I have been busy living which I think has been a good thing for my writing because seriously I have no idea what the hell I am doing.

Not surprisingly, there are other stories piled up behind this one and I need to start working on them soon. I hope that I will eventually find what I am looking for and can move on to them.